Dear Potential Partner (girlfriend, boyfriend, fling, hook-up, or play partner) of Any of My Partners or other Persons Important To Me, Current or Future:
When our paths cross, I will shake your hand, and smile and be honestly pleased to meet you. I am sure that there are lots of good things about you, things that my partner sees and enjoys, and may even love about you.
I want you to know, that I may be slow to find these things. I will regard you carefully. I will watch you from a distance. I will keep my ears open when anyone speaks of you.
I am protective. I worry that someone I love will get hurt. I will not think that you are good enough for my Loved One, until you prove to me that you are. I am not jealous, I am not being a bitch; I am not here to sabotage your relationship, whatever form that may take. I’m careful, and I do not trust anyone quickly or easily, even people who are attempting to get close to me.
I am cautious. Do not mistake this caution for cattiness. I am not afraid of being replaced by you. I am secure in my unique relationships. I have worked hard to develop meaningful ties to my people, and I continue to work to maintain those bonds. You will make your own place, and find your own space with your Important People. Eventually you may find yourself close to me, and my mamma bear claws will twitch when new people come around you.
(Or maybe you won’t.)