I did it.
I flew to Atlanta, presented two classes at Atlanta Poly Weekend, and flew home. I did not get lost, I did not miss any flights. I navigated an entire three days of high level social interaction, on my own. I knew a handful of people, and that made a huge difference. My friend Amul was very much my saving grace, and I hope he knows it. He picked me up from the airport, and delivered me to the conference hotel, even though he had plans that night with other friends. He graciously extended an open invitation to me to join them, but I needed to prepare for my classes, and some alone time in a hotel room sounded perfect.
I forgot a few important things, first, my camera, which was disappointing because I love doing portraits, and a poly con would be an awesome place for some divine people shots. And the second thing I forgot, was my hair product. Now, don’t laugh. A curly haired girl in Atlanta with no hair product… I almost cried! But I learned a wonderful thing.
Nobody cares. I had a great time, and my curly hair did too…
I met a new friend, who was interesting and funny, and ended up talking me through using the public transportation system in Atlanta to get myself to the airport for my return flight. It seems silly, I mean I function in my every day life as a competent single woman, with all sorts of responsibilities and things I’m in charge of, but I was amazingly overwhelmed in Atlanta. I’m truly a small town girl, and I didn’t even realize it until I wasn’t in the small town for a few days.
I led an amazing discussion on polyamory and mental health. It was so very well received, and I am positive I got as much out of it as I put into it. Such wonderful and self aware people and the discussion was just fantastic.
My cute new friend attended my solo poly discussion and stood out as very well spoken and thoughtful in his contributions to the conversation. He sent me a text a few days ago, saying he was looking forward to reading my blog write up about the weekend… He needs a name, so I’m naming him Texas. Not particularly original, but it suits him.
I wish I had a hot and heavy encounter in an elevator to write about, but the truth is I fell asleep on his shoulder my last night in Atlanta, in the middle of a story he was telling me, and he gathered me and my things up and walked me back to the room I was sharing with Amul. I’m shy and he’s younger than me, and he’s very pretty. The next day he made sure I made it onto the MARTA so I could make my flight home, and I found myself wishing I had another day to hang out and hear the rest of his story.
I have two potential dating partners here, not counting Special Man Friend, but I’m stuck or something. I feel a little whiny and worn out, like a three year old who needs a nap. “But I don’t wanna get to know new people. I don’t WANNA date.”
Except that I really do want additional connections, and dating and newness, and everything that goes along with it, is the process. I see SMF, and how energized he gets with new potential connections, and honestly I’m envious of the enjoyment he gets out of that great unknown. Where he gets excited, I get a stomach ache.
I need a nap.