Author Archives: Ginger

I still write, but it’s harder. I think the blog is gasping her last few breaths. I still love someone who loves me but we seem to be…paused.  The pause is vast and silent,   and so much bigger than I ever expected. I am open to life.  I am open to change. Still.

Today I met SMF for lunch. He told me he needed space and distance to decide what he needs and wants. Ironically, I almost told him the same thing about a month ago.  That I needed space and distance.  I wrote a long email discussing some of the hurts of our relationship that I stillContinue reading “~Forward~”

I’m seeing someone new.  He’s sweet, kind, affectionate.  He’s cooked for me, confided in me, asked to see me every day. I’m cautious.  Nervous. I’m trying to go at my own pace, even though it means I have to tell him I can’t see him every day, and it feels awkward.  We’ve only had a fewContinue reading “~New~”

“When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. It is an impossibility. It is even a lie to pretend to. And yet this is exactly what most of us demand. We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life,Continue reading “~Again~”

When I broke things off with Special Man friend, I had no plans past that day; that week.  I gave up.  I walked away from the most important chosen relationship of my adult life, for several reasons, which I have been trying to make sense of, and peace with for several months. I had noContinue reading “~Risk~”

In the two and a half months since my breakup, I have: cut my hair off lost twenty pounds detoxed from all sugar and grains given up my (formerly) beloved diet Pepsi completely signed up for a 5K started to make peace with the fact that I have clinical depression.  For real. read a dozenContinue reading “~Summary~”

Two months ago, yesterday, Special Man Friend and I broke up. More specifically, I broke things off with him. At the time, I thought it was the hardest thing I had ever done.  Since that day, sitting in the same sushi restaurant where we had first met almost five years before, I have realized that healingContinue reading “~Forward~”

​                                   Do not love half lovers                                            Do not entertain half friends  Do not indulge in works of theContinue reading “~Independence Day~”

I recently received a comment from someone on the blog, stating that I was needy, and that life wasn’t about getting what you want. At first I was offended.  Defensive, even, in a knee-jerk kind of way.  “Needy” is kind of a trigger word for many women.  It is for me, anyhow.  The last thingContinue reading “~Needy~”