I’m quite positive that there’s no way to avoid negativity.
I’m a worrier. Conflict makes me sick to my stomach, and awkwardness is worse. You know the kind of awkwardness I mean, when people are trying to be civil but everyone feels tongue-tied and is afraid to speak.
SMF and Mrs. A are both hurt and angry, and really, I should just let them have at it, but it affects me too. It affects what I’m trying to do with my local poly network. It seems nobody involved with either camp, (his, or hers) is comfortable, or at least nobody has found a neutral place yet. He has let a lot of it go, but when you live in such a small place like we do, and the poly community is even smaller, there’s all these cross relationships and friendships, and I just want everyone to be okay.
I’m certainly not neutral in my opinions, but I can usually let people live their lives as long as I don’t have to be adversely affected.
I’m positive that I need to step back, and figure out why I’m so stressed out about the two of them having such an ugly split.
I’m positive that our first monthly poly discussion group this week will be really interesting, either because people will stay away, or they won’t.
I’m looking forward to Atlanta Poly Weekend. I’m going to be all by myself, and that’s kind of exciting and also kind of scary. I’m sort of shy, unless I’m not. It takes a lot of effort for me to be around people I don’t know, but it’s also a little fun.
I’m complicated.