Poly Nirvana

Love, Life and Rational Polyamory



So March is my anniversary month for the blog.

I love my blog.  I have gotten so much pleasure and satisfaction from it.  I love that I have readers in Germany, and Canada, and dozens of other places.  I love the comments and the commenters.  Sometimes the stories spill from me in an instant, and sometimes I don’t write for weeks, because there’s nothing there.  It’s not time yet.

Then, when the stories come back, I feel so good, so settled, so whole.  When the words elude me, I sit and stare at the screen of my laptop, and wait.  Sometimes I wait a long time, before closing my computer and promising to come back later.

I am able to see some of the search terms that people use to find Poly Nirvana.  They can be downright hilarious…

  • polyamory secondary gets scraps (ouch)
  • I am terrified of the game changer polyamory  (Right there with you, sometimes.)
  • compersion love hot poly  (Hey, as long as it’s HOT poly.)
  • polyamorous relationship bullshit  (haha)
  • strawberry pumpkin pet name (Aw.)
  • ginger girl finds succubus (Love it!)
  • professorpolyamory daughter (weird, right?)
  • he doesnt communicate oftenly. does my manfriend really love me? (Oftenly?? But YES to MANFRIEND!)
  • succubus wants my cock (awesome!)
  • emotion fucks thought  (Word.)
  • fuck you back  (How on earth did this search term get someone here??)
  • unicorn girl polyamorous  (Oh no you didn’t…)

I seriously love that this little space of mine is two years old.

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I’ve accepted a new position doing case management for a large home health and hospice company.  I start in ten days.  I’m both happy and terrified.

Reporter has gone radio silent.  I think he’s shy, but a girl shouldn’t have to work this hard!  (Neither should a boy.  There should be some mutual pursuit.  Just saying.)

Special Man Friend and Mrs. A have broken up, but they are in that raw “just broken up” period, where everyone is sad and mad and hurt and confused and nobody has any distance from it, and nobody has made any peace.  (More on that later.)

I have three photo shoots this weekend. THREE.  Talk about performance anxiety.

CC is throwing a dinner party this weekend to celebrate SMF’s birthday.  I’m bringing baklava, which I will not be making myself.  I’m considering telling people I did, though.  (They would never believe me.  I never bake.)

I got to drive a few hours away and hang out with a fun friend and her partner.  So much good conversation and giggles and cuddling and happy sexy time! (More on that later as well. I’m still sorting through some thoughts.)

I want to write more.  I have felt a little self-conscious lately, as my important people read my blog, as well as a few others in my extended network.  It’s been dicey, with the recent difficulties between SMF and Mrs. A, and the previous stresses between myself and Mrs. A.  I don’t think I want to share too much, but I do want to talk about some of the lessons learned, and how this has affected me on my blog, while still being respectful of everyone’s feelings and privacy.

Easy peasy, right?